I don’t want to get married because I want to keep a dream or 2 alive. Honestly, getting married is the furthest thing from my mind but every time I see a new facebook posting about another ugly person that is engaged... I find myself drowning in chocolate wrappers and buckets of confused tears. Like WHY?! HOW?! and AM I REALLY LESS DESIRED THAN HER?! And now you know that my inner monologue is a cold hard bitch... awkward. This depression used to happen around major holidays, because most men that want to get married prefer to kill 2 birds with one stone. For instance, take our beloved Christmas holiday. Instead of getting you something you’d actually want like a Wii or an ipad, instead “Mr. Right” gave you himself... for... forever!!!!!! And I heard that it is frowned upon to return this gift (or regift maybe that would be positive adultery?)... well at least in my Catholic Culture. Therefore, I will not get married. However, this manic depression has grown darker thanks to our liberal ass politicians who are making gay marriage a thing. Do get me wrong, I LOVE THE GAYS!!!! Although, my fragile heart can’t take it. So I think that if you get engaged you should keep it to yourself or delete facebook because engagement is joke you should really only share with your grandma. Besides facebook is really only for stalking Exes and potential new exes... your happiness does not belong in my news feed.
Mi corazon es negro y frio porque tu.